I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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