Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
