I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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