He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
