my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
