toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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