Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
