i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Randomize
