Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Umm I'm too high to move.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
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