I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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