Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
