i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
