New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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