I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
