Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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