So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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