Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
