real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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