Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
she smelled like a LAN party
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize