Where did you get a picture of my penis
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
