it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
