i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
As shirtless as possible
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
