Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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