i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
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