Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
