Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize