whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
