She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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