so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
