yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
And the cops told us we were all naked.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize