from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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