I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
