God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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