Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
