i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
