At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize