I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit