I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
