if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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