and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
