all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
