Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
