Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
