is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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