I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
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