so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
If its not for food we ain't going out.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize