It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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