At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize