so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
