Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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